So love is a drug right? And I’ve been addicted twice.
Caring more about a man… than I cared about my own life.
Cooking and cleaning and giving all I had… to get high on an illusion… no my delusion… that you were all I had.
Temporary fixes to bring me out my lows… only to fall down harder with each of your physical and emotional blows.
Confidence gone. Replaced with confusion from your lies. Rationalizing the dysfunction, foolishly believing all your lies.
Baby momma drama… not one… but TWO. Walking the streets of Chicago while you ride so nicely…so care free… in a vehicle I provided to you.
Stealing my money. Stealing my pride. Taking advantage of my love addiction… pretending to care but in reality just wasting my time.
How did I fall so low? Where did I go wrong? …How did I allow you – No why did I allow you… I THOUGHT I WAS SOOO STRONG. …Losing myself and not forgiving myself… wow… this dose of love drug is too strong.
I checked with my dealer. I told him, “Yo you gave me a bad strain.” He said, “girl we tried to tell you, we’re not responsible if the product is lame.”
But eventually I ran out of money. This drug was too expensive and my energy was depleted. The Devil in the background snickering. …Negativity and Confusion enveloping and racing through my mind. I was overdosing… my life was on a lifeline.
No more funds to pay for fake ass love.
No concern. No empathy. No refunds.
But that’s when God….